March 31, 2011



the most annoying weirdo

" Here I am, a bundle of past recollections and future dreams, knotted up in a reasonably attractive bundle of flesh. I remember what this flesh had gone through; I dream of what it may go through. I record here the actions of optical nerves, of taste buds, of sensory perception. And, I think: I am but one more drop in the great sea of matter, defined, with the ability to realize my existence "— Sylvia Plath

March 26, 2011

hoam. sorry for late update. i'm kinda busy with my school and i need to study hard to face mid-term examination next week.
anyway, i went to fashion bloggers yard sale at FX yesterday. i bought cute tops and vintage floral skirts. pictures later.  and then I realized, I spent all of my money for this month in 3 hours. pathetic fact, I know.
then I'm back to my home with my brother and his girlfriend. 
as usual, I spent my night in front of my laptop. after make a cup of tea, I'm started busy with my "life" in internet.  I'm such an anti social -_-
a cup of tea is more than enough to against the silence of night

I don't have something more interesting to do. I just spent my night chatting with my friend named Zahrir until 2 AM. Seems bored? But for me, It's fun because we have many trashy topics to talk about haha.
even after zahrir decided to offline and sleep, I still can't sleep. Hah. Insomnia attack! I decided to read Sylvia Plath's book. After a few hours I read those book, my phone is ringing all of sudden. It's from Bayu. Lucky me.
Then we had a long conversation for maybe 1 or 2 hours. We talk about everything. He asked me how my day was. I told him how I spent my day and how bored I am with my school routine. Then he start to story about his college. About his friends. And about his routine in Jogja. I didn't feel sleepy at all. I really miss his lovely and warm voice, the way he laugh and giggling when I told him something ridiculous. After a few hours we talk, I decided to end the call because I started to feel sleepy. I still remember his last words "Goonight tut, don't forget to brush your teeth, pray before you fall asleep, and may Allah blessed you for your exam next week. amen. i wuff you"
hah. i'm really happy realized that he still care. about. me. :'''')
05:19 AM photoshoot

March 22, 2011

I see a tree, a tree with life. Birds, insects, flowers. It’s beautiful. If only life were like them, careless, free, and full of life.

March 20, 2011

Write something.....about Myself?

  • I'm Citra, Indonesian, fifteen, human since 1995. 
  • 10th grade student of 8 Senior High School Jakarta
  • Spent her lifetime in Jakarta and never get a chances from my parents to live in another city or country (sad fact) 
  • More facts about me:
    • I’m allergic to everything that consist with garlic. The smell, the tastes... I loathe it.  
    • Obsessed with rain, nutella, band t-shirt and floral
    • I planned to join to jazz-ballet class after a long time I always refuse it
    • I like Arctic Monkeys, shopping vintage stuff and clothes at Pasar Senen, travelling to the mountain, forest or another country, dance in the heavy rain and watch indie gigs
    • I take photographs. 
    • I don’t take any of these photos. Well, yes for a few photo that I mention it was mine, but mostly not. 
    • I like making poems, story, writing diary or making an sarcastic words. Well I don’t wanna to be an sarcastic youth, i just don’t have nothing more interesting to do:)
    • When i was a kid i wanted to be an astronaut. But now I want to be a person that have a career in Arts, Literature, Cultural studies or Social. That's why I really want to go to social class in 11 grade. Wish me luck! :)
    • I'm a loner. I'd rather spent my time at home in front of laptop, write something like this, watching dvd, reading a good book and listening to good music than spent my time for random activity that just waste my money. But it doesn't mean I don't have a friend. I have friends :)
    • My favorite food is everything that comes from my Mother's kitchen. Without garlic.  
    • I like Sylvia Plath & Soe Hok Gie
    • I don’t make any sense
    • I utterly in love with someone named Bayu 
    • I like hanging out with my friends, do the wild activity, feel the freedom of youth until the sun starts to rise
    • I'm a cynic. I speak fluently in sarcasm for some people that deserve to 
    • I'm not a kind of pretty girl or popular one. I'm just a mediocrity one
    • I'm a dreamer. I wish i could live in a brave new world
    • I want to make my parent happy and proud of me. And I'm in the process to do that
    • I appreciate every little things that I've got in my life. And I'm still in the phase where I'm trying to not regret everything that happened, not complain everything that I've got, and finish what I've started
    • I'm in the phase where I'm still finding who I am and who I want to be 
    • And the last, I just want to say "Hello" for someone that maybe regret to read this shit hahahaha :D 

March 19, 2011

 "Some things are hard to write about. After something happens to you, you go to write it down, and either you over dramatize it or underplay it, exaggerate the wrong parts or ignore the important ones. At any rate, you never write it quite the way you want to."-Sylvia Plath

March 15, 2011

"Make the clock reverse, Bring back what once was mine, Heal what has been hurt, Change the Fates' design, Save what has been lost, Bring back what once was mine"

You weren't mine anymore. Have a great adventure then. And I'm still pray to God, that we'll be together in the future. Amen.