April 30, 2011

Let Me Tell You About Something

messy. okay, i know it.
 I had a Formspring account. There are more than 250 questions inside my Formspring's inbox. And I rarely open my Formspring for some reasons and left all of the question pile up in my inbox. Most questions asked by anonymous and they frequently asked the same question. It's kinda lazy right if we had to answer the same question over and over again.  So, here are the questions that they often ask me on Formspring: 
1. Smoker? 
I'm not a smoker. I smoke rarely. and I really hate if people judge someone by if she/he smoke or not. No offense, I'm just trying to be honest.

2. Where do you buy most your clothes from?
Truthfully, flea market and my mom’s closet. She has a nice collection of things from her college and so forth years. They’re all cozy and worn and smell slightly of mothballs and make me look soft. And fyi, I rarely shopped at Forever 21, Topshop, Zara or kind like that. Meow. 

3.Why did your friends called you Citrut or Citut? What does it means exactly?
Well, Citrut is abbreviation from "Citra Curut". Weird. I know. Okay. Thanks. Bye.

It's personal question I guess. Why people always asked about someone's virginity. Virgin or not, it won't affects you anyways

5.Are you a kind of "Miss Popular"? Where is your school? Hows your high school life? 
I'm from 8 Senior High School Jakarta. If you really CURIOUS where's my school exactly, open Google. I'm not a typical of "miss popular" that always hanging out with big group on the school, party, have a lot friends or something like that. My friends aren't much in highschool, I'm not a kind of smart student...i'm really average. I do not have boyfriend in school like the other. And I must go through the high school drama. Well, that's my high school life and thankyou for ask about this :)

6.What are your favorite foods?
I eat any kind of foods (except pork or dog meat). Right now I’m in an Sushi Salmon (raw and unsalted) mood. Yum yum belly yum

7. How many Tumblr's followers do you have and how you gain much followers? Are you a kind of "Tumblr Famous"?
Omg. People frequently asked this to me. I have 13.025 followers. And I don't how to get this. Just talk and be nice to your followers. I don't even know how they find my tumblr. And I'm not a kind of "Tumblr Famous". Thanks. 

8. Who's Bayu?
He is the sweetest, cutest, silliest, dumbest and craziest human being that's ever been mine :)

9. Are you a good student or bad student?
Well, I should admit this, but I've been a very bad student in my first year of high school. But, hey, i'm in the phase that called "adaptation" :)

10. What do you do when you're sad?
Read a good book, make a cup of tea, lie in bed, clean clean clean, cry a little, keep my mouth firmly shut unless I feel obliged to speak. I become quite indifferent towards anything

11. I really want to have a nice & interesting conversation with you, but I honestly don't know how to start. I'm afraid I'd bore you or something. I imagined you're an arrogant person that only talk to "some" people
Speak your mind. I'll notice :) 

12.  Are you fashionable in high school?
This is ridiculous. No one ever asked this before. Well...i'm not. I'm not a fashionable person. I'm wearing a big size uniform, messy hair, and long gray skirt that not fits perfectly in my waist. Fashionable huh?

13.  I love your music tastes. Where did you get information for a new indie band or song?
Waw, thank you, it means a lot to me, really. I get it from internet, music & indie magazine mostly. Or you can google this web "Pretty Much Amazing". Enjoy :)

14.  I envy your life. How to have a great life?
You shouldn't envy someone's life. Because it's just perfect as it seems. Be proud and happy with your own life. Then you'll feel better and enjoyed every precious second of your life.

15. You're beautiful. 

April 20, 2011

 I have this urge to delete my tumblr, facebook, shut off my phone, walk to the train station, buy the first ticket to anywhere and run away forever.

April 17, 2011

"Love will tears us apart"

Happy birthday Jamban!!! :D

Today is Bayu's birthday. He's 18 years old now haha. And this is the first time I gave him a birthday gift after 3 years. Yea. I know maybe you were thinking like "Oh my gosh....you're such a cruel girlfriend". But hey.... Bayu always refuse if I planned to give him a gift. Dia aja pas tau kemarin gue udah beliin kadonya masih sempet-sempetnya marah karena menurut dia gue maksa banget huhu. But, nevermind, let's skip that part.

Anyway, you guys must be wondering, gue ngasih apasih ke Bayu? hehehe. Well, I bought Sigur Ros vinyl for him. Because 2 weeks ago, he told me that he already gave up looking for Sigur Ros vinyl in Jogja and Jalan Surabaya Jakarta.

So, after 4 hours surfing on internet, looking for information for the shop that sell Sigur Ros vinyl, I find it on Kaskus. Then I wrote the shop adress and phone number. Terus gue coba telfon dulu buat ngecek toko ini jual gak album sigur ros yang gue cari....dan ternyata MASIH ADA STOK NYA TINGGAL SATU+DAPET DISKON! Hahaha. Omg, I'm so happy.
Sigur Ros album tittled Takk. I've been looking for this vinyl for 4 hours!

 Jadi begitu tau masih ada, langsung gue gaspol motor ke daerah Kemang dan langsung beli vinyl itu hehe. Frankly, saat itu gue bener-bener lagi megang budget seadanya banget. Dan Bayu marah karena ya itu..... maksain menurut dia. But hey, ini cuma sekali-kali kok. I really want to make the people around me happy. But don't worry, it's still fine as long as I'm not forget to make my own self happy. 

Well, once again, happy birthday my Jamban. Maaf setelah sekian banyak kejutan-kejutan manis yang lo kasih ke gue, gue baru bisa kasih lo ini. Hope you like my present. I love you


April 13, 2011

5 wishes list (again)

Well, today wasn't my birthday. But, maybe, most of you wondering why I make wishes list. Haha. Well,  I like making wishes list. About everything! And I just don't have something interesting to do but hey, this is my blog anyway haha. Well, here's my wishes list :p

1. Graduate on time from my Highschool
Most of you maybe wondering why I put this on the first place in my wishes list. But yea, I hate highschool, and I can't wait to go college.  Why? There are many reason that too long to explained in this post and you'll get bored when you read that. Anyway, I really want to graduate from my high school on time. If could, I really want to skip these part, or maybe just 10 grade part, and just go to 11 grade when I'm in Humanity Class. Yeah, I really want to go to Humanity Class, learning social knowledge since I was 8! But in reality....I can't skip or run away from everything. And I should face it. And frankly, I failed in a few subjects in first term. But then I but then I tried pretty hard to end my sadness and fix everything. I do my remedials, study hard and never forget to praying for the best result in the end. Wish me luck! :)
2. Sorbonne University
Maybe  when you read my second wishes you might say "SHIT, WAKE UP DREAMER!". Hahaha. Well, judge me as much as you want. I don't care. But seriously, I really want to continue my studied in Sorbonne University. Well, if I had a chance to studied there, I'm not afraid with every challenge that comes later. Is that the reason why we were living right? To take every chance and risk, and face every challenge, to live our life. But, i'm not stilted talking about "Sorbonne", I'm young, full of possibilities and had a second option or plan :)
3. Travel The World
I'd like to go to Ireland, Switzerland, New York, London, Las Vegas, China, Bangkok and many other country in my list of country that I'd like to visit someday. And honestly, I stuck in crowded city and traffic-jam everywhere called Jakarta. And yes I never travelled to another country. Pathetic fact. 
4. Feel the Freedom of YouthYes. I can't wait to get this. I always imagine myself party until morning with my friends, travelling to nowhere, being a backpacker, sleep naked, get drunk, smoke cigarette and weed, taking a lot of photographs, picnic to the forest, swimming in the ocean, waking up early to watch sunrise from the top of mountain, make a diy-art project, and many things that I myself would give up if I should mention it one by one. In short, I can't wait to do that
5. Be happy and....
Yes. I think everyone's wishes. Be happy and do sweet things for beloved people around me. I want to be happy. Have a great future, make my parents proud, go to Makkah with my family, do the fifth pillar of Islam, Hajj. And then I work in a good place, then married with someone I love, then have a 3 childrens; 1 girl, 2 boys. Then when my children is growing up, they'll married with their mate and I have a grandchild. Then my grandchild started to call me and my husband "grandpa and grandma". Then me and my husband spent our rest life by watching our children success and our grandchild growing up. And then I dead and go to heaven, meet my mother, father and my brothers. What a wonderful life.

April 10, 2011

I hate this. Seriously.

Lord. I hate this when school task disturb my sunday afternoon. I really hate it. Like, seriously. And none of my friends (read: school friend) that could be reliable for this.
This is one of many reason why I can't wait to leave my high school and go to college
if I could, i would skip these part. beneran deh. i would "remove" my first year in high school from my "life-timeline". i really hate this part. desperately hate this. if I could I would skip these part to 2 or 3 years later when I'm in the 11 or 12 grade and it's not take a long time to wait for a college.
but i'm just a human being. i don't have time machine or something like that to remove these part from my life. there's nothing that i can do except, well, deal with it; die or alive walau dengan babak belur, yaudah hadapin. nikmatin aja satu tahun ini dengan ugh, what should i call them.... JERKY DORKY PEOPLE? Yea, whatever.
Anyway, after all of the shit they put on my face (not literally of course, are you fucking kidding me? i would never let them do that!) there are still a few people that still makes me laugh and smile di sela-sela semua kekacauan ini. Thanks untuk mereka dan segala hal simpel yang mereka lakuin tapi berarti banget untuk gue :)
Well, enough for today, gonna take a bath and dvd marathon. :)

Me <3

April 8, 2011

(by amourstatique)
current mood: just like the picture above

April 6, 2011


"maybe they'll complain about every bad things that we've done to them"


click through this link for original source. or this to see this post on Tumblr

April 5, 2011

I hurt people's feeling. I break people's heart. I ruined their life. I deserve to die.
 "People change. Feelings change. It doesn’t mean that the love once shared wasn’t true and real. It simply just means that sometimes when people grow, they grow apart."
- (500) Days of Summer (via ohcardigan)

April 2, 2011

"Dont Be Afraid To Make The First Move"

It's really awkward to write something below this words. Okay. Let's begin. 

My mom said "don't afraid to make the first move"

I'm kinda speechless for a second. There're a thousand scenarios, words and scars against my mind after she said it.

Damn. She's right.

It's been a long time I'm letting my self drowned in this silence-pain. It's been a long time since I always wishing for something that pretty impossible to coming back. It's been a long time since I always kept "my scenarios" about "moving on" in my thoughts. And It's been a long time since I always denied the reality that he.... had moving on and would never come back.

I need to live my life. Moving on and keep forward. It's time to admit it that 3 years just a period when we were together and it was ended.

I'm letting you go. Have a great adventure with the new one and so long :)

I'm fine. Really. I feel so great. It feels like a new spirit locked perfectly with my veins.

It's 00.11 AM. I'd to tell my mom tomorrow that I'm not afraid to make the first move ...and I always making it :)


PS: here are a photos I take while I wrote this post. Midnight photoshoot. Yea. My life. Enjoy!

April 1, 2011

April Fool's day today 
c'mon dude... this should be interesting


Robert Sheenan

more information about him? here :) 

PS: sorry just put his web link on this post, kinda tired to describe him and too fascinated with his picture. just one word: HOT!)